Why Chinese Mothers are Superior
65Amy Chua: Why Chinese Mothers are Superior
Why Chinese Mothers are Superior
Amy Chua has sparked a firestorm of controversy with her assertion that Chinese mothers are superior to Western mothers. She opines that in China, parents care about their children. She goes on to say that parents in America and Europe do not care about their children.
Her basis for these opinions is that parents in China will shame and torture their children into academic superiority while parents in the West will coddle their kids all the way to a destiny of failure and corruption. Chinese parents demand excellence while American parents put their children's happiness before their abilities. This is, of course, Mrs. Chua's opinion. Amy Chua is a Yale University Law school professor and one of her daughters, Lula, has performed at Carnegie Hall. She is proud of her kids and their success and is not afraid to tell Western moms how to raise their own children.
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Amy Chua and Western Parenting Techniques
According to her new book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, Amy Chua thinks that American and European mothers are lazy and shiftless and care not what happens to their children. Americans, according to Ms. Chua, are wimpy and soft and care more for approval than success. Since the parents are no good, the children are no good too, according to Chua.
In contrast, Chinese mothers demand the best possible results at all times from their kids and would sooner disown their kids than allow them to "earn" anything lower than a "A" grade. Emotional, physical and psychological abuse is a common tool in the toolbox of the Chinese parent. The ends justify the means according the Amy Chua. Her book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, should be a guide for any Western parent who wants to see their offspring graduate at the top their class at Harvard or perform at The Met by age 7.
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Asian Moms vs. American Moms
Asian moms have the stereotype of caring more for their kids than white mothers in America. That is because moms in China will not let their children out of their sight. Chinese moms will hound them and hound them about their homework and their chores until the child is so anxious about pleasing their mother that they are nervous not to be perfect.
By contrast, American moms have a more go with the flow idea about raising their kids. Moms in the West will put the child's self-esteem above their own welfare. Moms in the West will do ANYTHING to make their children happy. If, as a result, the children are well-rounded and full of happiness, then all sides of the parenting-childhood divide win.
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ExpertCLB, this is an excellent hub! Amy Chua is correct! Not only Chinese, but Asian and Asian-American mothers place more emphasis on intellectual and academic achievement than non-Asian American mothers. Many Asians and Asian-Americans had mothers who believed in education first, second, and third. These mothers, some of were uneducated themselves, made sure that their children were educated far beyond their dreams. Studies show that Asian and Asian-Americans have higher academic achievement than Caucasian-Americans, Black Americans, and Hispanic Americans. Asian and Asian-American mothers are doing something RIGHT!
TPSicotte 15 months ago
China's literacy rate is 82nd in the world at 93.3%. America's is 21st at 99%. In china that means 87.1 million people can't read. In the America, 3.12 million can't read. On the basis of that statistic one could male an argument that China's parents and education system are failing their kids. Of course, there may be lots of other factors affecting the statistic so I won't make that generalization, because I would just be using one small piece of information as a measure of success.
My point is that Ms. Chua's high opinion of Chinese parenting is only that. Her opinion. I am sure other parents who parent in same autocratic way, whether from Russia, England, Vietnam or Mars also believe they are right. That is what authoritarian parents do. When it works they take credit and when it fails they blame their kids.
Educational success is only one measure of success. I am sure that a country the size of China will have a few genius types rising to the top. Could they have even more if parents like Amy Chua were more supportive of creativity and self-direction? It's possible.
Other parents might measure success by the quality of relationships they have with their kids. Some might measure it by the emotional and mental health of their children. Others might only look at whether their child chose a career they love. Still others might only consider financial factors as a true measure of success.
There is nothing wrong with having high expectations as a parent. However, perfection is a mistaken goal that can lead to anxiety and depression. Ms. Chua's opinion on western parenting is over the top and really based on ignorance because in the west we have all types of parents, including ones like Ms. Chua who push and prod their children mercilessly to succeed.
But it is her opinion and she did what she did because she cares for her kids in her own way. Do her children love what they do? Are they emotionally and mentally well adjusted? Are they the wealthiest children in America? Do they have great communication and a good relationship with their parents? Well I have no idea, but my guess is that for many parents these other factors would be considered more valuable than her primary measure, educational success.
Michael Dell, the founder of Dell computers dropped out of college. Bill Gates also didn't complete his college degree. Movie director Steven Spielberg didn't finish college either. Designer Coco Chanel did not attend college. Author, playwright and screenwriter Gore Vidal never attended college. Photographer Ansel Adams didn't complete High School. Founder of Mary Kay cosmetics Mary Kay Ash didn't attend college. Woody Allen dropped out of college twice. Architect Frank Lloyd Wright didn't graduate from High School or college. All of these people were and are incredibly creative and successful people who didn't have the higher education credentials that parents like Ms. Chua might consider a sign of success. Yet by many measures these are very successful people...and not one of them, by the way, was raised by a Chinese mother....hehe